


earshot

by ndnickerson



Series: Rain on a Tin Roof [9]
Category: Nancy Drew - Keene
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-19
Updated: 2009-12-19
Packaged: 2017-10-04 15:21:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ndnickerson/pseuds/ndnickerson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Samantha wants to come home from her father's house early.</p>
            </blockquote>





	earshot

**Author's Note:**

> Falls between the third and fourth parts of What the Sun Didn't Burn.

"Hey Mommy."

"Hey baby," Nancy said, smiling into the receiver, even though her daughter couldn't see it. "You doing okay?"

Sam was quiet for a minute, and Nancy felt something prick in her throat, even as she shifted Jessie against her hip. "Sam?"

Sam sighed. "I'm doing okay."

"Is everything all right?"

Sam paused again, and Nancy shifted her glance to Ned, who was just putting together his briefcase, getting ready to leave for work. "Sam?"

Nancy could hear the soft sound of a click, like the closing of a door. "I want to come home."

Nancy motioned to her husband, who came over and took Jessie out of her arms, his face a question. "Early?"

"Yeah," Sam whispered. "I'm sorry."

"Okay," Nancy said, her heart racing, as she stared down at the table. "Okay. But you don't want to tell your Dad and Callie?"

"No," Sam whispered. "I don't... want to tell them."

"How about if I tell Callie that you have a sleepover that we forgot about, and you want to come back early for that? Would that be okay?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. Let me talk to Callie, and we'll get all this figured out, even if I have to fly up there tonight to get you. Do you want me to come get you tonight?"

"I... I can do it. If you want me to."

"You want to come back on your own?"

"I can."

"Okay. Let me talk to Callie, and then I'll call back and let you know for sure, okay baby?"

"Okay," Sam said, sighing in relief. "Okay, Mommy. I love you."

Nancy sighed when Sam handed Callie the phone. "I am so, so sorry. It's her best friend, and we totally forgot about it until right now, and Sam didn't want to bother you guys with it..."

"It's okay, I understand," Callie said. "Maybe she can just stay a few more days next time."

_Not if Ned has anything to say about it._ Nancy looked over at her husband, who was bouncing a giggling Jessie on his lap. Cole came tearing through the kitchen, and Ned looped an arm around his son's waist, dragging him to a stop. "You about ready to go, tiger?"

"Yeah," Nancy replied to Callie. "I'm going to check with the airline and have Sam's ticket moved, and then I'll call you back with all the information. Thanks so much for this."

"It's fine, really. Sorry about the mixup."

"No, I'm sorry..." Nancy glanced over at Ned, then wandered out onto the back deck, just out of his earshot. "You doing okay?"

"As well as I can," Callie said wryly. "But then, I don't have to tell you that."

Nancy walked back in with the phone loosely cradled in her hand, and started looking over the papers stuck to the refrigerator. Ned followed her with his gaze, even as Cole squirmed.

"Everything okay?"

Nancy glanced down at her son, then at her husband. "Everything's fine," she said with a bright, forced smile, belaying her unease. "Sam's coming home early, that's all. I just need to find the number to get her ticket changed."

"Sam's coming home early?" Cole's eyes lit up.

"Yeah." Nancy ruffled Cole's hair, then dialed the number while she found Cole's cereal, slid it onto the table, and reached into the other cabinet for a bowl. Jessie started squirming in Ned's arms, and while he found the milk he bounced her lightly against his shoulder. "Hi... yeah, I need to change a ticket reservation..."

Hannah arrived ten minutes later, while Nancy was on the phone with Callie again, and Ned was standing in the front hallway, looking down at his watch. Nancy came up to him, the phone still to her ear, and he heard her say that she loved whoever was on the other end. Then she hung up and they both rushed outside, to their cars, where they were out of earshot of Hannah or the children.

"What's going on."

Nancy sighed. "I don't know," she admitted. "But Sam will be coming in at nine tonight."

Ned nodded. "Okay, so I guess we'll be at the airport later." He reached for her, drawing her to him, and she closed her eyes when he kissed her. "Love you."

"Love you too," she whispered, and kissed his cheek. "Have a good day."

"Don't know how good it's going to be, with this to be worried about." He shot her an uneasy smile before climbing into his car.

\--

The rewrites were already done. Nancy was at her desk, shuffling through a few files she'd been keeping for just this kind of rainy day. Human interest stories, loose circumstantial chains of evidence that didn't quite prove political scandals yet. In the rest of the newsroom, the junior copyeditors were tracing their blue pens over mockup pages and the sports reporters were taking turns throwing balls of paper through their miniature-hoop nets. The deadline was up and Nancy's editor was meeting with the owners, and Nancy was telling herself that staring into space, trying to figure out why Sam had sounded upset that morning, was a bad idea when her cell phone rang.

She glanced down at the ID and immediately her heart started pounding. She scooped up her cell phone and headed for the stairwell, the roof.

"Hello."

"Nancy."

Nancy closed her eyes at the sound of her ex-husband's voice, her hand lingering on the rail, then set her mouth and continued the climb up to the roof. "Yes."

"Sam called you."

"Yeah, Sam called me. She remembered that her best friend was having a sleepover this weekend. I already talked to Callie about it." Nancy shoved open the door and closed her eyes in the sunlight, the breeze cool against her cheeks. "I'm really sorry, but it's not a big deal, is it?"

"It's not her birthday or anything."

Nancy closed her eyes. "I don't want to get into this with you right now."

"So there's a better time?"

Nancy sighed. "Okay. So you're calling to complain about the fact that Sam's coming home early. Fine. I know. Is there anything else?"

"What, you mean like the fact that your—_husband_," Frank said, his mouth twisting on the word like he found it nauseating on his tongue, "has been poisoning Sam against me since the day he met her?"

Nancy's cheeks flushed, but she kept her voice steady. "Frank, you've been doing a damn fine job of that yourself."

Frank laughed harshly. "Thanks. Because that's all it's been, really. It's all about how much I want Sam to hate me."

Nancy took a long moment and forced herself to breathe steadily. "Look, I know you... I knew you were going to be an ass about this, but for her, can you stop and think for one second about anyone who isn't you? She's your daughter, for Christ's sake, and all you've done lately is blame me and Ned—" she heard him hiss in displeasure at the sound of her husband's name, but continued, "for the fact that you can't even be bothered to get to know her, all you want to do is say it's someone else's fault."

Frank was quiet for a minute, and when he did speak his voice was cold, hard, small. "My daughter. How do I know that for sure?"

Nancy's face went white and cold. "You asshole."

"How do I know she's mine? For all I know you were fucking around even then on me—"

"How long have you been saving this up, huh? Since the day you signed the papers?" Nancy's voice was just as hard. "You think you're not her father? It's not like we were even together, and if anything, you were cheating on Callie with me. You think I would have come to you, you insensitive prick, unless I had to?"

"You think you had to? If I'd known then, what you would do..."

Nancy closed her eyes. "Then what, Frank," she said softly. "Then all we did that day on the train was acknowledge that it would never be, didn't we. Here we are, you're married to Callie and I'm married to Ned, and Sam is all we have in common. And now you're doing the same thing to Callie that you did to me."

"Don't you even talk about my daughter."

"Oh, the one you're sure that actually is your daughter, you mean? Because you learned so much when the two of us were together, didn't you."

"Yeah, I learned a lot. Mostly that I'd rather have a wife who wasn't a whore."

"Yeah, because you're around so often to keep her satisfied. Or do you take extra assignments just so you won't have to go home to her."

"Nancy—"

Nancy closed her eyes, bent almost double, leaning over the railing. "Look," she said, her voice exhausted. "I'm tired of fighting. I divorced you to get away from this."

Frank snorted. "We didn't start fighting like this until you left me."

"Only because you didn't want me until you couldn't have me anymore."

Frank sighed. "I'm beginning to think I never did."

When they hung up Nancy stood still for a moment, replaying their conversation in her head, remembering what Frank had said. _Asshole,_ she thought.

Then she flipped her phone open and pressed the speed dial.

"Ned Nickerson."

"I want to fuck you right now."

She could almost hear his mouth drop open. "...Wha...?"

"Can you get out of work early?"

"Y—Yeah," Ned stumbled. "Yeah, I can get out of work early. Where?"

"That little hotel at the end of Lake Shore Drive. As soon as you can get there."

"As soon as I can get there? You kidding?" Ned chuckled. "That's a given."

She was down to her bra and panties when Ned walked in, shrugging out of his suit jacket, and her gaze wandered down of its own volition. She chuckled.

"You been carrying that hard-on since I hung up the phone with you?"

Ned started unbuttoning his shirt, not even bothering to look down. "Yeah. Scared the hell out of a couple of the interns, and I think turned them on a little."

Nancy slipped off the bed and unbuttoned Ned's pants, tugged down his zipper. "You are taking too long," she told his briefs as she pushed them down.

"So what brought this on?" Ned kicked his pants away from his ankles. "Not that I'm complaining..."

"You've always wanted me to just call you up in the middle of the day and tell you I want to fuck you, haven't you."

He shrugged. "Well, yeah," he admitted, and she laughed. "Although... would you mind too much putting the heels back on?"

Nancy paused, her bra already halfway down her arms, and fluttered her eyelashes at him. "Only the heels?"

"Just the heels," he confirmed, sliding back on the bed, regarding her from his back. She stepped out of her panties and back into her stilettos, then slipped onto the bed on her knees. "Oh yeah."

"Good?"

"Yeah," Ned said, reaching up to cup his hands at her waist as she knelt over him. "Although you didn't answer my question."

Nancy looked away. "I'll tell you..."

"Is it bad?"

She was motionless, her thoughts miles away, her knees pressed against his hips, but her eyes fluttered shut as he slipped his hands in, to trace the delicate skin of her inner thighs. "I got a phone call."

Ned searched her eyes. "From Sam?"

Nancy shook her head and Ned relaxed slightly. "So she's not worse. And very soon you need to tell me whether you want me to redirect the blood back to my brain, because it's going to be quite hard..."

"It already is quite hard," she said, pitching her voice low, and mounted him swiftly. "Why the heels?" she asked, gasping.

"Good memories," Ned explained, then shifted his hips up against hers. "God, you're wet. Were you thinking about me at work?"

"Yes, that's all I do," she teased him, beginning the gentle rock, groaning as he flicked her nipple with his thumb. "I sit at work thinking of things to do to you when you get home."

"And, believe me, the city of Chicago loves you for it," he said, then closed his eyes. "Fuck. Nan..."

She leaned down, her hair sliding over his shoulders, and claimed his mouth with a kiss, taking him another inch inside her, and he moaned. He reached down and cupped her ass in both hands, urging her down, and when they were seamless her mouth was open and still against his, the movement of her hips frantic against his, and he reached up and buried his hands in her hair, tangling his fingers against her scalp.

"Ned..."

"Come," he whispered, his lips brushing her ear, and she buried her face against his neck, her nipples trailing over his chest as they moved together. He cupped her breast in his palm, then trailed his fingertips down her chest, and she nodded as they lingered over her abs.

"Touch me."

He thumbed her clit and she shuddered, her breath hot and wet against his shoulder, and he closed his eyes when she moved against him in short hard thrusts, matching the rhythm of his stroking, until he felt the first clench between her thighs.

"Nan..."

She screamed against his shoulder as she began to come, and when she tried to pull back he dug his fingers into her ass, keeping her pressed against him, and thumbed her clit even harder. She was shaking, desperate, gasping when he came, his thumb stilling against her clit, and she collapsed down to him, groaning, her hips flush against his.

"It was bad, wasn't it," he said, still gasping. "Whatever happened to make you fuck me like this."

She dragged her hand through her hair, pulling it away from her face, before she pushed herself up on her elbows. "I can't have your dick in me when I talk about this," she murmured, swinging off him, her eyelashes fluttering at the feel of him as he slid out of her, then stretched out at his side.

"That sounds very bad."

Nancy closed her eyes, her hands folded under her head.

_I could have come to you when I found out I was pregnant, I could have never told him... I should never have told him._

Ned traced his fingertips down her face, silently, and she quirked her lips up in a smile before she opened her eyes. "Frank called me."

She could see his face tighten as she searched his eyes. "Of course he did."

"He just wanted to be an ass about Sam coming home early."

Ned leaned forward until their foreheads were touching. "Did he say what was wrong, why she wanted to come home?"

"No, just some bullshit about how we've been poisoning her against him."

Ned chuckled, but the sound held no humor. "He does a good enough job of that himself."

Nancy replied with a genuine laugh. "That's what I told him. He didn't take it very well."

"He doesn't take anything very well, does he," Ned said, lazily, draping his arm over her waist and pulling her to him.

"Do you need to go back to the office?"

Ned shook his head, his eyes closed. "My erection and I were given the rest of the day off."

Nancy laughed and felt him smile at the sound of it. "Well then," she said. "I know your erection likes to stay entertained."

"You're one to talk, you little nympho."

"Yeah, well. I have to go back to work and figure out if the police chief has been taking bribes. Unless another one of your secret fantasies has been to stay under my desk and eat me out every fifteen minutes..."

"Actually, it more involved you being under my desk, and doing something slightly similar, that more involved my dick than your clit. But, you know, I'm sure we can negotiate something."

"Yeah, it would be easier, since you have a corner office..."

"Stop it," he ordered, trapping her nipple between his index finger and the pad of his thumb. "You really don't want me thinking about it. It may be hot for you to call _me_ in the middle of the day and do something like this, but..."

"What, you'd opt for a broom closet instead?"

"A broom closet, skirt, and no panties," he replied too quickly.

She smirked. "Is there any scenario you haven't played out in your head?"

He shook it slowly. "Nope. Although I'm always open to any new suggestions you might have."

Nancy kissed his cheek before she rolled over and groped on the floor for her bra. "Tonight, in our bed."

"There's nothing new about that," he objected, stroking his palm down her side as she pushed herself up.

"You complaining?" she asked, smiling over her shoulder, before pulling her panties back on.

He laughed. "Never."

\--

Sam looked so much like her mother.

She had spent nearly every second she could that summer outside, running around in their yard, until her limbs were tanned a smooth even brown and her hair shot through with strands of gold. When she came down the escalator Ned noticed immediately that she was clutching her stuffed dog to her side, and when he exchanged a glance with Nancy, he saw the same heightened fear in her face.

"Hey baby," Nancy called, and Sam ran to her mother as soon as she was free of the escalator. Nancy swooped Sam up into her arms, her impossibly long legs dangling, her arms wrapped tight around Nancy's shoulders.

Nancy laughed and smoothed Sam's hair back from her face. "Hey. You okay?"

Sam nodded, then slid down and came over to Ned. Ned had Jessie against his hip, but he wrapped his arm around Sam's shoulders, and she slipped her arms around his waist.

"Hey baby."

"Can we get some ice cream on the way home?"

Nancy looked down at Cole, whose eyes had lit up at the suggestion. Jessie was up past her bedtime, and was nearly asleep against the line of Ned's arm. Something in Sam's eyes was pleading, though, and Nancy nodded.

"Okay. Very quick, and then to bed, all right?"

"Okay," Cole said, jumping up in the air. "Awesome!"

Nancy shook her head. "I don't know what I'm going to do with the two of you."

"Keep us forever," Cole said seriously, and Nancy laughed.

"Yes. Keep you forever."

Once they were at home, after Jessie was down for the night and Cole was nearly asleep in his own bedroom, Nancy went in to see her daughter still sitting up, awake, the bedside lamp on, her journal open across her lap. She shut it, color rising in her cheeks, when she saw her mother approach.

"Can't sleep?" Nancy sat down at the edge of Sam's bed, and Sam shoved her journal under the pillow.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay, if you can't sleep." _Why is she sorry, why does she keep saying she's sorry..._ "Do you think it would help to talk about it?"

Sam shrugged, not meeting her mother's eyes. "Maybe."

"Can you tell me what happened?"

Sam sat mute and motionless for a minute before she shook her head. "I don't really want to talk about it."

"Was it something... that happened with your body?"

Sam shook her head, and Nancy almost sighed in relief.

"Because, you know, we've talked about your period, and how you can go to Callie..."

"It wasn't that."

"Is it something I did?"

Sam shook her head. "Oh, no, Mommy. You didn't do anything." Then Sam's lips went white and thin, and she looked away again.

"Ned?"

Sam shook her head violently. "No."

Sam's shoulders were tensing, and Nancy sighed inwardly before she put her hand on her daughter's arm. "You know you can talk to me."

Sam nodded. "I know."

"I just want you to be happy."

Sam nodded. "I know," she said softly.

Nancy waited another long moment before she patted Sam's arm, then walked out of her room.

"What did she say?" Ned's arm was across the back of the couch, his face already turned up toward hers, blue in the flickering light from the television set.

Nancy shrugged. "Not much," she admitted. "Something happened, and it wasn't something you or I did..."

Ned shook his head. "I can guess," he said darkly.

Nancy looked down at her hands. _If she's even my daughter._ She shivered.

"You okay?" Ned draped his arm across her shoulders, then pulled her toward him. "Do you have a... bad feeling about this?"

"She's never asked to come home early."

Ned was quiet for a minute. "Do you think it would make a difference if I talked to her?"

Nancy shrugged. "It can't hurt, right?" Then she smiled up at Ned. "You're like me with a mystery right now, aren't you."

"I just... need to know she's okay, you know?"

Nancy nodded. "Go talk to her."

Ned nodded, then reached over and kissed her. "Wish me luck."

"Good luck," she whispered, returning the kiss. "And once you're finished in there, come to bed."

Ned smiled, then knocked lightly on Sam's door, waiting until she called for him to come in to push it open. "Hey."

"Hey."

Ned shut the door behind him and walked over to Sam's bed. "I'm not going to ask you what's wrong."

Sam blinked up at him. "You're not?"

She was twelve. Ned had met Nancy for the first time when she was three years older, fifteen, and her resemblance to her mother struck him again when he looked down at her. "Nope. You know why?"

Sam shook her head.

"Because if you want to tell me, you will," he said.

Sam looked down at the other pillow on her bed, still quiet, and Ned felt his stomach clench. He didn't want to think it, didn't even want to suggest it to Nancy, but he had a terrible feeling about it, about whatever could have caused Sam to come back to them early.

"You have to promise not to tell Mom."

Ned nodded. "I promise. It'll be just between us, okay?"

Sam nodded. "Okay."

Ned plucked at the covers when she stayed quiet. "You took your dog with you?"

Sam looked down at the stuffed dog he'd given her, and smiled. "Yeah. I always do. He doesn't know he came from you."

Ned hid his smile at that. "Your dog makes you feel safe?"

Sam nodded, then paused. "You won't tell Mom."

"I won't tell Mom unless you want me to."

Sam grew quiet again, and this time Ned didn't talk, only waited. 

"I heard... I heard Frank tell Callie that I... that I look like..."

Ned's fingers tightened against his knee.

"He said that I look like my... my bitch whore of a mother." Sam looked up at Ned, her blue eyes shining with tears. "Why did he say that? Why did he say that about me?"

Ned could feel himself flushing, and he had to look away from Sam's face and the naked hurt there. "He shouldn't have said that."

Sam pulled herself out from under the covers and crawled into Ned's lap, resting her cheek against his shoulder, and Ned wrapped his arm around her, struggling to keep himself from shaking with anger. "Why did he say that," she whispered, and he saw a tear trace down her cheek.

"Because... because of the choices he and your mother made a long time ago, before you were born, and he's not happy about them."

"Before I was born?"

Ned nodded.

"What kind of choices? Why did he call Mommy..." Sam's face twisted. "Those things."

"When people get divorced, like your mom and Frank did, sometimes later they get mad at each other for things they did..."

"What things?"

Ned looked down. "I know you're going to think that I'm just trying to get out of answering this, but... Sam, I'm fine with talking to you about this, it's just that we need your Mom in here."

"But... won't it make her sad?"

_Angry. Very, very angry. I think he stopped being able to make her sad a long time ago._ "It's something that grown-ups say when they're angry, and it's ugly, and it's something we shouldn't say, so you shouldn't say it about anyone... but I don't think it'll make her sad."

Sam turned her face into Ned's chest. "Why shouldn't I look like Mommy," she murmured. "I thought I was supposed to look like her."

Ned smoothed Sam's hair back. "You look a lot like her. I met your mother when she was fifteen, and when you're fifteen, I think you'll look a lot like the way your mother did then."

Sam smiled. "Good," she said.

Ned stroked her hair a few more times, then shifted. "Do you want me to go get your Mom now so we can talk about this some more, or do you want to finish this up later?"

Sam considered for a moment, then shook her head before she pulled the covers back and crawled underneath. "Not tonight," she decreed. "You're sure it won't make Mommy upset."

_Upset. That's a good word._ Ned shook his head. "Not the way you're thinking."

"Okay," Sam nodded, tucking her dog into her arms. "Are you and Mommy mad that I came home and made you switch the plane?"

Ned shook his head and stroked her hair again. "No, we're not angry that you came home, and don't ever worry about that. If you feel like you need to come home, all you have to do is call and we will come and get you, no matter where you are. And if you take after your mother, that could be pretty much anywhere."

Sam smiled. "Like with her mysteries?"

Ned nodded. "Like with her mysteries. Are you going to go to sleep now?"

Sam nodded, snuggling against her pillow as Ned reached for the lamp beside her bed. He was about to switch it off when she murmured, "Good night, Dad."

Ned smiled. "Good night, baby."

Cole and Jessie were asleep. Jessie looked like she was out, but when Ned was about to turn away he saw her eyes pop open, and she regarded him steadily, her blue eyes speculative.

"Go back to sleep, baby."

She put her knuckle up to her mouth, then closed her eyes slowly, and Ned sighed as he closed the door behind him, checking the locks before he headed to their bedroom.

"That's it. I'm going to kill the motherfucker."

Nancy flipped off the television, her face going white. "What did he do."

Ned chuckled sarcastically, shaking his head as he unfastened his jeans and shoved them down. "Sam said she overheard him telling Callie that she, Sam, looked like, and I quote..." Ned paused, making sure to slowly enunciate every syllable, "her bitch whore of a mother."

Nancy looked away, flushing. "Not that he didn't basically say the same thing this morning, but that wasn't within earshot of our daughter."

Ned stared at his wife. "_What,_ exactly, did the jackass say this morning?"

Nancy shrugged. "The usual. Although he did seem to be more... irate."

"Nancy," Ned said, a warning in his voice, as he slipped into bed with her.

Nancy sighed. "He was angry. I understand that. I would have been angry too. Today he was..." Nancy trailed off and looked away from him. "He was even trying to say that he wasn't sure Sam was his."

"Oh really."

Nancy let her chin drop to her chest. "He's never said anything like that before, and if he wants to be an ass about it, I'll have the test run, but..." She shook her head. "He called me a whore, and then I said he was pretty much guilty of whatever I did, and... it was just an ugly conversation."

"So, what? He's saying that he thinks I'm Sam's father?"

Nancy shrugged. "He as good as implied it."

Ned chuckled. "Well, you know, I really have no problem letting him believe that. After all, it's not like we didn't practically come close enough..."

Nancy let her lips curve up in a smirk as she looked over at him. "Right. Because it sounds so much better to say I was sleeping with both of you at the same time, and don't know who her real father is. As though I would have picked him, if that were true."

Ned shrugged. "If this is just between the four of us... if he's going to act like a punk, I say let him. Let him think she's mine. I'm the one she calls her dad anyway."

Nancy considered for a moment, her eyelashes fluttering down as Ned's hand found her breast. "As tempting as it is..." She slipped down to lie on her back, arching under his touch. "It could backfire. He tries to prove she's not his, and ends up proving the opposite."

"Not that any of that will matter," Ned murmured, rolling over to press his hips between her open legs. "I'm going to kill him, remember?"

Nancy nodded. "Make it painful," she murmured. "I mean your killing my ex, not..."

He smiled against her breast before he took her nipple into his mouth, flicked his tongue over the tip. His hands slipped down to cup her hips, to urge her knees back and apart.

"Is she okay?"

Ned worried her other nipple under his thumb as he pulled back to look at her. "It upset her," he admitted. "But I think she was most afraid that it was going to upset you."

Nancy shook her head. "I just can't believe... I mean, Frank has really become a total asshole since I left, but to do this to her..."

He closed his mouth over her other breast, kissing her nipple slowly, before he pulled back. "She's a reminder," he said softly. "She reminds him of what you were to him, and she looks so much like you..."

Nancy searched Ned's eyes. "Is that what she is to you, too?"

Ned smiled, then traced his hands down her stomach. "She's your daughter," he said. "She's yours, and when I married you, I knew that I... what I would see in her, and that I would know, but Nan, I love her. Whatever happened back then, that was in the past and it's done, and she's not Frank Hardy's daughter to me, not anymore. She's ours."

Nancy trailed her fingertips down Ned's arm. _She could have been ours from the beginning._

"Nan..."

She looked up at him, just as he leaned down and kissed her. "It's all right," he whispered against her mouth. "It's going to be all right."

She closed her eyes. "She's my life," she whispered. "You and my children, you're my life, and I can't believe he would hurt her..."

"It's okay. I'll kill him."

She smiled, but a tear slipped down her cheek. "You can't kill him," she whispered. "We can't undo what we did."

"But we can at least try to make sure that nothing like this ever happens again." He trailed his lips down her stomach, and the sound of his voice was muffled against her skin. 

Nancy groaned, her fingers tangling in his hair as he buried his face between her thighs, his tongue finding her clit. Her knees pushed back to her chest. "Is the door locked?" she panted.

Ned traced his teeth against her clit before he pulled back. "Yeah."

"Good."

She was wet, trembling, on the point of orgasm under him, when he pulled back and pressed his hips between her thighs, and she pulled him to her, burying her face against his shoulder. "You're the best," she groaned. "You know that, right?"

He smiled, then pushed himself back up to sitting and lifted her legs to drape them over his shoulders. "I've heard you say it, oh, a couple hundred times."

"Believe it yet?" She tensed when he pressed inside her, her hips tilting back to make the angle perfect, and pushed herself up on her elbows.

"I don't know," he teased her, stilling. "Could you tell me again?"

She let her head fall back until the crown was brushing the pillow, her throat bared. "You are so, fucking, good at this," she cried, gasping between every word. "Oh God."

He groaned when she began to match his thrusts with hers, leaning forward until her knees were pressed against her own chest, her ankles crossed at the back of his neck. "Yes," he whispered against her forehead as she came, as he came with her, and then closed his eyes, breathing her breath.

She swallowed against her dry throat, reaching up to run her fingers through his hair. "I love you," she whispered.

"Love you too," he breathed, kissing her hard before he pulled back, collapsing at her side, his arm draped over her bare chest. "Love you too."

Nancy closed her eyes once he fell asleep, listening to the house settle, feeling the rise and fall of her husband's chest. She kissed his shoulder and he murmured against the pillow, his arm tightening around her.

When she woke again, Ned was deep asleep and she didn't even want to look at the clock. Jessie and Cole would be up early, wanting pancakes, and Sam was home...

Nancy pulled herself slowly, quietly out of bed, wincing when a bedspring creaked, and found her bathrobe. She pushed their bedroom door open and slipped her bare feet against the carpet in the hall, until she reached Sam's room.

Sam was asleep. Her journal was still open on the other side of the bed, her pen still uncapped, but in the blue dusk Nancy could only see that the page was blank save for a single line. Sam moved in her sleep and Nancy saw her stuffed dog, the one Ned had given her, at the edge of the bed nearest the door, tucked under the covers with her.

_Sam_. The night she had been born, Nancy remembered the look that had been on her father's face when he had held his granddaughter that first time. In the hospital, alone in her room, she had picked up the phone and wanted so badly to call Ned's parents' house, to find him, to hear his voice, to tell him.

To tell him that she'd had another man's child.

She hung up without calling, against the insistent harsh burr of the dial tone, cursing herself for a fool, and Frank had come in looking apologetic, and she had forced a smile, and their silence had continued.

Nancy pulled the robe tight around her and looked down the hall at her bedroom door, but her eyes were swimming, and she couldn't go back to bed, her throat was already tight and pricking hot.

She went to their living room and sat down on the couch in the dark, and sat perfectly still until the first sob clenched in her chest. She buried her face against her knees, against the hem of her robe, and cried, because it hurt, it still hurt, even after all these years. She gasped in a long shuddering breath, trying to keep quiet, trying to keep anyone from hearing her, because if Sam saw her like this, it would break her already fragile heart.

Her pulse was pounding in her ears and that was the only reason she didn't hear it. She felt a tentative hand on her back and sat up quickly, rubbing her eyes with the sleeve of her robe, to see Ned sitting beside her, barechested, worry in his gaze.

"Baby, what's wrong."

Nancy took a long breath before she slipped her arms around his shoulders, burying her face against his skin, and he hugged her to him in response, his palm rubbing circles over her back. "Nan, you're scaring me."

Nancy gasped in a breath. "She should've been yours."

"Nan..."

"I thought he deserved to know," she whispered into his shoulder. "I thought... my God, I thought he was better than this, and I wanted you... oh God, if I'd come to you that day, I should have told you..."

"Shh," he whispered, stroking her hair back. "It's okay."

"What have I done? What did I do to her..."

"You did what you thought was best for her," Ned murmured into her cheek. 

"But I wasted so much time," she whispered. "Thinking that he would change. But when I... it wasn't right since that day, since I..." She shook her head.

Ned sighed gently and pulled her into his lap. "I love you," he mumbled into the crown of her head. "We can't take back what happened. I... if I'd been able to swallow my pride and my anger and call you, maybe everything would be different now, but this... we made our choices, and we have three beautiful children, and I won't lie to you, I'd be happy if we never saw Frank Hardy again."

Nancy smiled. "Yeah," she whispered.

"And if he pulls any shit like he did today... Nan, I swear to God if I ever see him again... Sam was in my lap tonight and she was crying about what that prick said."

"God," Nancy whispered, dragging her sleeve over her eyes again. "This is what I didn't want. I never wanted to hurt her."

"He did."

"But I put her in this situation. I made this possible."

Ned pulled back and forced Nancy to meet his eyes. "_Frank_ did this," he corrected her, his gaze hard as it searched hers. "Frank did this. You did not do this. And he... Nan, I think it all comes down to the fact that he knows he wasn't meant for this life. He doesn't..." Ned shook his head, his jaw set. "If he was any kind of father, he'd never talk about her that way."

Nancy nodded. "I know," she murmured.

"You know that if I could adopt her, I'd do it right now."

Nancy looked down, shaking her head. "He'd never do it," she sighed. "Just to spite me, to spite us, he'd never do it."

Ned cupped her cheek under his palm. "If he's already trying to pretend he's not her father, maybe he's closer than you think."

Nancy looked up again and searched her husband's eyes, hardly daring to think about it. "We should talk to her," she murmured. "She needs to know... that there's at least one adult in this life who isn't going to betray her."

Ned smoothed her hair back. "Everything you've done, has been for her," he said softly. "I think she knows that."

Nancy smiled. "All except for her father."

"Yeah, well," Ned murmured. "Maybe that's one mistake we will be able to fix."

In the morning Nancy came into Sam's room when Ned was serving up another plate of pancakes, and despite the sun streaming through the window Sam was still stubbornly asleep, her face buried in the pillow, her palm resting against her stuffed dog's chest. She had knocked her journal onto the floor while she slept, and Nancy leaned over to pick it up, automatically reading the one line on the nearly blank page, in her daughter's sloping handwriting.

_and Dad said Mommy won't get upset and they'll always come for me, no matter what._

Nancy flipped the journal shut and had to pinch the bridge of her nose between her fingers to keep the tears back, but her voice still wavered slightly, even after she shoved the journal under the other pillow and took a deep breath.

"Hey Sam, baby, wake up," she said softly. "Dad made pancakes."


End file.
